I had to make some major cuts to who I was spending time with so that I could grow into the woman I wanted to be.
I used to be one of those people who never wanted relationships to end. Be it romantic, friendships or even family. I thought that I could somehow keep toxic relationships going in some capacity and attempt to compartmentalize them.
If I never brought that one friend around my other friends, then I could stay cordial with said friend and not bring down my group of friends with their toxicity.
Guess what?
IT DOESN’T WORK!
I have a niece (she’s only 4 years younger than me) who I lived with and who I would invite out with my friends and to parties I went to. She was one of those people who I needed to warn my friends about before she showed up. Saying, “She comes off bitchy, she doesn’t mean it. That’s just the way she is. She’s really funny once you get to know her.”
She would come to the festivities, make an ass out of herself and be mean. My good friends would just ignore it, however people who I wasn’t able to warn beforehand would approach me and say things like, “Who is that? What’s her problem? Why is she such a bitch?”
Years passed. No one in the family ever dared to say anything to her because she would make family gatherings to intolerable it was just easier to ignore.
Until the day that I had finally had enough.
She’d been so mean, vindictive and overall crappy for so many years that I just couldn’t handle it any longer. The straw that broke the camels back was when she raised funds via donation website for her brother’s funeral. I planned and executed everything to give my nephew a proper fair well. Though modest, I knew the cost and I knew how much she had received. When she refused to reimburse me for the venue, at the same time asking her FB friends where she could buy a used car, that was it for me.
I had to cut ties with her and with her immediate family. The drama in my life went from unbearable to non-existent. It was the best decision I’ve ever made.
There may be people in your life right now who are keeping you from growing or adding so much drama that you can’t keep things straight. I’m not saying that you have to totally cut people from your life like I did, however spending less time with them and distancing yourself could be just what the doctor ordered.
Action Steps
Take an objective look at the people who you surround yourself with the most. Remember that you are the culmination of the 5 people that you spend the most time with.
Do they add to your life positively? Do they have traits that you like and want to have? To they have your back? Do they encourage and inspire you? Are they positive?
Or do they add more drama than positive influence? Are they always asking for help from you and not giving back? Do they attempt to get you to do things that you don’t want to do or know that you should’t? Are they negative?
If they have more traits from the second set than the first, you need to consider why you are staying in a relationship with them and what you need to do to limit time with them or walk away from them altogether.
If you are a woman who is ready to step into the next level of herself, I can help. I specialize in teaching women to embrace their inner power, increase their confidence and create the lifestyle that they want.
Email me at Shay@TakingInspiredAction.com for more info.
Connect with me on Social Media:
IG: https://www.instagram.com/my_inspired_action/
FB: https://www.facebook.com/MyInspiredAction
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UComr1wUG5j2BLMXBo7uPfEg
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shaykent/
